My heart is racing. I can feel the steady hammering against my chest. Strong. Loud. My thoughts are spinning. Fast. Unstoppable.
‘What if I cannot meet the deadline?’
‘What if the result is too weak?’
‘What if I am not convincing enough in this important meeting?’
WHAT IF … I fail … I loose… I am not enough!?
The what-ifs kill my sleep. The pressure takes away my joy. The stress assassinates my peace. I am not me anymore … and I have no idea what to think … or do …
I hate these moments. This is not the life I want. This needs to STOP!
So I pause. I breathe. I think.
What if I walk away right now? Just leave the context. Remove myself from unhealthy expectations – even the ones I set up for myself.
I am wondering: Who told me that the meeting was that important? What is the measurement for a weak result? What is going to happen if the deadline is not being met?
I have given my circumstances too much power over my life. Somehow I attached myself to expectations that feel unhealthy. I need to walk away.
As I am sitting in silence and detaching myself from the expectation level, I am realizing how the pressure fades away. My heart beat slows down, I can breathe lightly. This is how I want to live my life.
I am realizing: I don’t need to leave physically. Moving mentally does the trick.
With a deep breath I get up. Ready to go back into the game. Smiling.