• Highheels

    How my mindset influences my skillset

    “I am such a looser.” “Everyone else gets the tasks done – but I am again running detours.” “Of course, this bad luck happened to me. As always.” Do you know any of this negative self talk? If you ever say these sentences aloud, chances are high that your inner talk is filled with messages of self-doubt. Have you ever wondered why you think this way? Our brain is amazing: once we start thinking certain messages, our brain learns that we need this information and builds its network accordingly. It gives us quick access to certain thoughts until they become routines and we need less energy to access them. Unfortunately,…

  • Boots,  Highheels

    What to do when a team member quits

    “I need to leave the team”, she sighs. After training her the past year in different roles, I have offered her a leadership position in the team. And while she was thinking about it, she realized that she needed to focus on another role in her life. And that role is not in my team. I have mixed feelings: I am more than proud that she thought deeply and made a decision (these are the type of people I want in my team!) all while I am sad because I will not work with her in the future anymore. Did people quit in your team, too? It is very easy…

  • Boots,  Highheels

    Your narrative determines success or failure – but differently what you expect

    The project is intense. Everyone delivers at their best. You deliver at your best. You walk every extra mile – for the client, for the team, for your career. Mostly, you get positive feedback. But one of your deliverables gets rejected. The feedback feels horrible. Instead of walking on and putting the one negative feedback in perspective to all the affirming ones, your mind plays a trick on you. The feedback regarding your work somehow transfers to you as a person. The sentence „the deliverable is not good enough“ echoes into a „you are not good enough“ – getting louder and louder. If the self-talk isn’t stopped at this point,…

  • Highheels

    Do you dare to dream?

    “My dream always was to build a sailing boat”, he smiles. “And I have already created the design with a well-known yacht architect.” As we start discussing about design elements of boats and how life led these two people together, I let the moment sink in. This is exactely the type of talk that I have missed so much during ‘lock down’. Not meeting new people also means not meeting new ideas. And while you don’t feel the absensce of those ideas on your couch, it is more than deliberating when talking to people and exploring their thoughts and dreams. Just a day earlier, a lady tells me her story…

  • Highheels

    Why should I even head for a career?

    Whenever I ask women what ‘career’ means to them, I hear ‘personal development’, ‘having impact’, ‘developing others’ and further more. What is never a driver is ‘money’, ‘power’ or ‘status’. Interestingly, most coroporate careers offer exactly that: status, power and money. They are tightly connected to the hierarchy levels within the ranks. And ‘running through these ranks or ‘climbing the ladder’ is the general definition of doing a career. As this system has been designed by men for men, it is no surprise that there are little incentives that are attractive for women. Unfortunately, a lot of women do not pursue a career because the immediate gratification seems irrelevant to…

  • Highheels

    Is it opportunistic to take that new job? Or: When loyalty becomes a toxic value.

    I can recall many conversations in which the behavior of colleagues – especially younger colleagues – got labeled with being ‘opportunistic’. For example, when they asked for a new project opportunity, said ‘no’ to extra work or even switched companies for a new offer quite quickly. The word ‘opportunistic’ has different shades, but in these moments it was used in the bad sense of the word – with the slight touch of betrayal and unethical behaviour. As I knew a lot of these people very well, I knew that they had what you call a ‘good heart’. They did not act out of bad motives. For them, having the choice…

  • Highheels

    Why you should always have a notice of termination ready

    Like every morning, he is opening his word document, adjusts the date and saves his termination notice. He never turns it in. But the feeling of being ready to leave any time relaxes his mind when the pressure gets on in the project. It‘s his daily reminder that each job and task is temporary and that the power of ending any business situation is in his hands. Feeling in control and being aware that there are always options is an important factor when it comes down to feeling well at work. Maybe you know the feeling of being stuck. It quickly turns into a damned and doomed scenario where it…

  • Sneakers

    Happy Easter 2021 – but how?

    Easter 2021 is a chance for recharging, reflection and refocus. Four days in a row given to you – with no special family assignments, official gatherings or even services. At the same time, you cannot rely on any routines as most of your usual Easter activities probably have been canceled. In order to use your time well, some thoughts in advance are needed. Why? If you think back of the past weeks: what particular moments can you remember? Often people refer to this corona time like one endless week in which each day is so similar to all this others that it is hard to tell what happened when. Easter…

  • Highheels

    What do you want?

    “What do you want?” – the question haunts me ever since my coaching trainer asked it. It seems an easy question at first. You would assume that one knows what he/she wants. But do you really? I want to have a loving family. I want to have a lots of friends. I want to be rich. I want to look healthy. I want to be successful. I want … The list can be continued. But as you dive into just one topic, you soon realize that everything of that list needs a certain investment. Every single aspect requires time, dedication and focus from you. Let’s take one example: A loving…

  • Highheels

    Your positive attitude is fake

    “Your positivity is fake”, is an accusation that people with a confident mindset might hear regularly. This sentence often comes with the argument that life isn’t always sunny and that the negative aspects need to be named aswell. But do they? Is there a global requirement that requests to name all aspects in all situations? For sure, there are moments of important decisions when all aspects need to be taken into consideration but this is not a general requirement when adressing an issue in the company, project or team. Actually, it is quite hindering when you want to take the next step with your team. As a leader, you have…