#teambuilding – Consulting in Highheels

Build the workplace of your dreams

„You can do this“, a glimpse of encouragement runs through her mind while she is facing her challenge. Despite her fear she lifts her chin and takes the next step. „You can do this“, she recalls the words of her friends and family. Confidence rises. „I can do this“, she speaks out loud and takes the leap.

Independent whether you need to make a decison, want to face your fear or take the next step in your work, encouragement will always lift the weight of insecurity and worry. Life gets easier when you have the courage and vision for the path ahead.

Same is true in your working environment. Each day you face new tasks, projects or people. Having a voice of encouragement around will increase your mood and things will work more smoothly.

Encourage [en-kur-ij]
To inspire with courage, spirit or confidence
Dictionary

Encouragement literally means to inspire someone or oneself with courage. By speaking words of encouragement to someone you actually speak courage and confidence in that person`s life. For people these positive words are like water to a plant. It is a necessity to grow.

The beautiful truth is that you can be an encouragement to your clients, colleagues and bosses. Every day you can decide whether you want to water the souls of the people around you. By speaking words of encouragement people around you will start blooming – giving you the possibility to work and live with people that are happy and courageous.

I am convinced that you can build the team of your dreams when you start speaking positive affirmation to the people around you. Be aware: It requires you to take control of your thoughts and words. If you think shit all day, probability is high that you will speak shitty, e.g. destructive comments or gossip. But if you master your thoughts and direct your words to the uplifting of people, you will see an effect in the people around you within weeks.

Same is true for your boss. People in leadership roles hear very seldomly positive talk. This is due to their role; when all is well, they won’t get involved in the matter. But when there are problems, they are the adress of escalation, leading to a lot of negative topics on their table. Ideally they are mature enough to handle the negativity; reality is that they often push down their negativity on the team. Take advantage of such behaviour and invest encouragement into your boss. Be the one with joy at work and give your boss a good time talking to you – which doesn’t mean to avoid the hard topics. It just means that you speak hope and confidence when it is appropriate.

Who will you encourage today?

This is how to build a great team out of nothing

What do you think is needed in order to have a great team at work? Does it evolve by accident or has it been built by purpose?

Your answer to this question is very relevant and will influence your leadership style and mindset. If you are convinced that a great team evolves by accident, you will never invest in people but rather be jealous of functioning teams around you – telling everyone how “lucky” they were having such a team. But if you are assuming you can build and influence a team, you will act and speak differently.

As a house is built with an architectural plan, I am convinced that teams can be built on purpose as well. And even if you enter a functioning team, it needs maintenance to stay strong. Let’s have a look at some major aspects:

Select People

You don’t need many people – start with 2 or 3. Select carefully upon mindset and values. Be clear which values are important to you and which mindset you want to have in the team – and then look for people who align with you.

Personally I am a great fan of a “can-do-attitude”. People who think in solutions rather than in problems are part of my tribe. I have found that ideas develop much quicker when throwing them into a room of people who want to contribute to the solution instead of nagging of all the disadvantages. Nagging requires zero talent. Thinking strategically ahead of how things could work shows creativity and is fun to discuss on.

Write yourself a list of what you need to see in people in order for you to invest in them. And then be selective. Not everyone needs to be part of your tribe. But if you have the right people, you will enjoy every meeting!

Accept timing

Building a team requires time. You will need to invest a lot over quite a long time. If you have the vision, you are the one walking in the front. You need to be the example and role model – and your people have the freedom to adopt everything that inspires them. This freedom is so very important. And it is also the reason why you need to find the right people first.

Everyone is free to make his/her own choices. You want to be such an appealing example that people freely follow. And that needs time.

It also needs rituals. A regular meeting or call. Set up projects and events where everyone can contribute. Take care that the people in your team meet on a regular basis. For a virtual team this could be a weekly call. For a team that works on a daily basis it might be the break out session on the rooftop terrace of your office or the monthly bagel breakfast. Just make sure that the interaction is not only evolving around content driven work, but involves personal aspects. These personal aspects will lead to finding out similarities – and when people see a part of themselves in others you create that stickiness that leads to strong teams.

To get away from content driven meetings you can start with some small talk or an inspiring question. Here are some ideas:

What did you wanted to become when you were a child?
Who is your favourite music/movie star and why?
Which book do you recommend to the group and why?
Which food should be all taste?

Have a plan

If you are the builder of the team, you need to have a vision. Why are you building the team? What do you want to achieve?

There are tons of reasons: you want to develop a certain product or set up a service; you want to develop people and bring them to their next level; you want to earn a lot of money and with your team you earn more than working alone; you want to have fun at work with your team.

It can be all of them or a few. The only important thing is that you have a plan. This plan will lead you through tough times when you have trouble finding the right people or if you have selected a person that is not contributing to the team spirit.

I am convinced that this list is not sufficient. What ideas would you like to add?

A compliment a day keeps burnout away

They are doing an experiment: walking to people and tell them that they are beautiful. The result is captured on video and the faces are stunning. Everyone smiles. Shy. Proud. Happy.

Watching these clips even makes me smiling. Seeing happy people resonates within me and I get happy, too. Can you relate? When we smile during the day all of the sudden the tension of a moment is gone and life seems easier.

What if we could use this effect at work?

Last week I could see this effect on my colleagues, too. I actively looked at my colleagues’ reaction when I had the chance to speak support, hope and encouragement in their lives. They all smiled.

Getting in contact with someone who has good and honest intentions for us opens our hearts and gives us a moment of relaxation. Having those moments at work gives back energy and people can progress in their day more energized. All that is needed is you. This one person that is watching out where to spend the next honest compliment or the next story of hope.

Let’s do a challenge this week: Find one person a day that smiles because of you.

Use feedback to speak potential

If you ever had a leader who spoke about your potential you will never forget how much power that released in you. Therefore learn how to address the hidden potential in your mentees to grow your team.

“Now we speak of your weaknesses … hm … I should have said ‘potential areas to grow'”, my project leader winks at me with a conspirative smile. Someone must have told him that speaking of ‘weaknesses’ isn’t cool anymore – and therefore he needs to use a cover word. But the intention of his next sentences was clear: to show me areas where I fall short in his opinion. I hated working for him.

I guess, if you are around in business for a few years you know those feedback situations. You might even have learned in trainings to use cover words yourself and somehow work through feedback sessions – unsure what to say and how to say it. Or even convinced that this is the final day of judgement where you can tell your co-workers all the stuff you hate about them.

And then, there are those great people in businesses – real mentors who speak to you and afterwards you feel positive and stronger. Not because the content is only polished-positive but because they somehow speak in a way that you can actually use to grow.

In the past years, this monitored discrepancy made me wonder and search what feedback actually is meant for and how it can be delivered in order to see people benefit from it.

What is feedback?

By definition feedback consists of two attributes: Firstly, there needs to be an observation of something that happened – e.g. by a team member in the workplace. Secondly, this observation must be useful to leverage a change on it and therefore lead to improvement.

feedback/ˈfiːdbak/
information about reactions to a product, a person’s performance of a task, etc. which is used as a basis for improvement.
Dictionary

For example: A colleague sends out an important email to a wrong address. A useful feedback could be: The email was sent to the wrong address (description of what happened). You seemed to be under timely pressure and therefore you didn’t ask a colleague for review (sharing the observation). When you need to send an important email the next time, please ask someone for review (explanation of a potential improvement).

Feedback brings awareness to an area of unconsciousness. And by getting to know the information, one can get better.

Use feedback to light a fire

For sure, sometimes feedback needs to focus on behaviour that limits the career of a colleague. And by giving examples of their doing they are set free to change.

But what do you think of this perspective: Use feedback not only to state situations where a person failed but rather in which he/she has been really really excelled. There are a lot of people who outgrow themselves when you emphasize their strengths. Ask yourself: What does your mentee unconsciously do positively and needs to be pointed out?

Lately, one of my teammates needed to present a difficult topic to the client. We rehearsed the essential parts. Then the big day was there. She performed brilliantly on stage. Which I told her afterwards. But I did not stop there. I described all aspects of her strong performance precisely so that she could see why it was very successful. I even emphasized on her strength as a speaker and told her that I want to see her on larger stages and that she has a voice to be heard. She beamed for joy.

Another colleague of mine always did a great job but stayed somewhat silent in the overall group – you could almost miss that he was there. In feedbacks I emphasized on the very trustworthy results. Those results should be shown to others. They were proof of a brilliant mind. And we as a team would love to see more of the smart person behind the reliable work. Step by step the colleague became more visible and spoke about his contribution to the project.

Adress the potential!

In addition to giving feedback you can grow your mentees on purpose by getting to know their strengths. Here are some ideas: ask your people what they are dreaming about. What is his/her goal? Where lies the passion? Take some time to think: Is there any possibility for you to give your mentee a stage to live his/her passion? Here are some examples:

(1) Did you just hear that he/she likes to speak in front of many people? – Find a client or internal meeting and give him/her the role of the moderator.
(2) Did you hear a certain topic (that you are not familiar with)? – Find a colleague and connect them so that your team member can pursue his/her passion.
(3) Did you hear he/she loves to work alone on a difficult problem and find the solution? – Find a project in which that strength plays out.

Seeing people walk in their strength with joy and passion, lifts my mood. Therefore I always try to speak about the potential I see in people. Sometimes they are not aware of it themselves or they are unsure whether they are allowed to follow their dream. To give these people a special kick by a wholeheartedly feedback regarding their potential, is pure joy.

Try it, too.

Teambonding

A team that sticks together because they like each other is much stronger than a team just focussing on the same cause. Get some inspiration how you can intensify the bonding in your team.

“I remember best the meeting in Brussels,” a colleague shares her memories. “We had to improvise in the very last hour before the event – and with some creativity we made it happen.” The whole team is gathered together and celebrates the past months by sharing funny stories and deep learnings. Some team members will leave soon as their contract is ending, and we are taking a moment of thankfulness and appreciation. Everyone listens, everyone shares some insights, all laugh together.

Teambonding.

When you already have a team, it is essential to create events and moments of memory on a regular basis. Those shared memories create a bonding that survives all the stress the daily hustle throws at your people. It is the strong invisible game changer that lets your team thrive in hard project phases where others fail.

But how can you create meaningful moments? Here are some inspirational thoughts.

Moments of Thankfulness

Pick one or two days in a year in which you dedicate some time to share what you are thankful for. Let people know beforehand that they will need to share their stories, too. That way you give them time to think and prepare themselves. Make it a bit fun by asking them to find a matching headline, movie title or hashtag. It helps them to focus on the real essence.

Moments of Appreciation

When you plan a meeting prepare some gifts and warm words in advance. Encourage your team to tell each other which strengths they like about each other. Act as a good example by handing out some meaningful gifts and add a personal note by highlighting specific attitudes and behaviors that you value within your team mates. Give them some time and space to also share their opinions and feelings.

Make the moment last

Have you ever had a great day at work – and the very next day it seemed to be forgotten and you are in your hustle again? Human beings tend to forget the cool stuff quite quickly and go back into complain-mode or pity-party. If you want to help your team to remember their value and worth, create a written proof with everyone on the day when you meet.

Here are some ideas:

Write all your cool hashtags and movie titles on a board. Maybe do it in a fun creative colourful way. And then take your team picture in front of it.
Share pictures of the event afterwards
The letter of appreciation that is written by all to everyone. Here is how: Give each team member pen and paper. Each one writes his/her name on top and passes the paper to the next person. That person writes compliments, strengths and positive adjectives on the paper that is dedicated to the colleagues name on the top. After a few minutes you pass the paper on until everyone has given a compliment to everyone. That way everyone takes a visible proof back home.

In the mentioned team meeting we actually wrote the letter of appreciation to one another. When everyone had the chance to read the dedicated lines, you could see the smiles on everyone’s face. It was an awesome moment in silence. Appreciation settled in. And while the sun was clothing the sky above us in golden light we were all filled with joy and stronger bond to one another.

How to have a great team meeting

Having sat in way too many boring meetings, I set up an agenda that involves all participants and makes our weekly meeting fun. Get some inspiration in this article.

“With you, guys, I can be honest. You feel like friends.” is one of the best sentences I have heard in my latest team meeting. Though we are basically a virtual team – seeing each other 4 times a year – we managed within a year through weekly calls to build a strong team that connects on a deeper level. Now everyone looks forward to our team call and leaves the 30 minute-talk laughing and refreshed.

While a lot of people might think that this was just pure luck, I know that there are certain principles that pathed the way for this team to evolve. Let me share a few of them with you.

Regularity builds trust

Setting the scene is essential for a great play. Therefore team building starts with some administrative stuff that frames your playfield. You need to decide, when does the team meet where for how long.

Find a day and time that is usually not booked in your company and when all team members are available without having stress to make it. In order for people to remember the last meeting and to get a feeling of regularity, I suggest to use a weekly rhythm. In that way people don’t miss too much if they are on vacation or on sick-leave. In addition, choose a length that is manageable: 20 – 30 minutes are totally enough to build a strong team.

Especially in the beginning of creating a team it is crucial to not miss one team meeting/call. Choose the timing so well and stable that it doesn’t have to be changed in the first months. As a leader you have to make that meeting your very priority. The people attending will easily feel whether you are committed or if you already skip meetings in the beginning. The regularity of that meeting/call already builds trust – trust in you as a leader that you are doing what you told your team. Trust me – if you skip a meeting in the first few month, no one will give you a bad feedback, but it will have a negative effect on your team building.

Congratulation, now you are set up and the game can start. Let’s have a look at the agenda.

Use the agenda for the right dynamic

What is the one thing everyone loves talking about?

Themselves.

It’s true. If people tell stories they usually talk about themselves. This is how we are made. We feel important and part of a group when people take time to listen to us. And therefore that component should be essential in your team meeting/call. Everyone gets the chance to speak and be heard because it raises the engagement in the meeting/call of every attendee. In addition, it helps your team to get present and be in the here and now.

Here is an easy way to start a meeting in which everyone is heard: Every team member gets 2 minutes to share their thoughts in the beginning about 2 categories.

Work
Personal insight

For the category Work you can ask: How was your week? On which project are you working? What is the latest update and status? (pick one question)

Questions in this category help your team members to reflect upon the week. They have a break in their hustle and ask themselves where they are at. Which such a question you give your people a platform to get present. In addition, that type of a question triggers the logical side of the brain and it is an easy start to share some thoughts because it is the main mental area your people work with on a daily basis.

The category Personal insight is much more creative and builds a balance to the logical question No. 1. You can ask: What was your highlight this week? What are you grateful for? What made you laugh?

These questions are also reflection questions but they connect to positive emotions. And those emotions are the glue that you need in your meeting/call so that people connect. Your team needs to laugh together. They need to celebrate successes together. These positive moments will create a team spirit no task can ever do.

You – the moderator of the meeting/call – are responsible for setting the scene. Explain the 2-minute-rule and ask the questions. Comment gently on each contribution – especially when you are in a call and cannot see each other. A nice “thank you” or “well done” creates interaction. Make sure you share your 2 minutes, too. It is very important that there is an equality between all attendees although you are the moderator.

With this start you have used 1/2 – 2/3 of the meeting/call. And that is totally fine. It is the most important part. In the beginning of your team meetings people will share high level information. Trust needs to evolve over time. But soon you will see that they are opening up. And seeing the team grow is pure beauty.

the Positive ending

After the contribution of everyone you can bring in all the admin-stuff and knowhow that needs to be shared. Whatever you or a team member wants to share stay in a 3-minute slot for each topic. You want a meeting/call as easy and light as possible. In the beginning the 3-minute restriction feels like a burden, but soon you will realize how much can be shared in that time without creating information overload.

When you head for the end of the call invest a little bit in positive vibes. Raise your voice, bring in emotion. Invest in the good mood of everyone. This has nothing to do with being fake – but as a leader of the call you are responsible to bring in a good laugh and joyful atmosphere. Trust me, everyone is more likely to come to the next call when they know they will leave the meeting/call with more energy than they attended.

Words have power

There are words I will never forget – for good and for bad. The power of words can be used to build people up or destroy relationships – How do you use your words?

Can you remember the first time you heard the words “I love you”!? Your world changed. It felt like magic. That emotion running through your veins was indescribable. Three little words – with impact. Same is true for negative words. Ever heard a “you will never succeed in this”? What impact did it have? Remember that disbelief or disgust from a teacher or trainer? I guess you can still recall that pain those words caused.

There is something in us human beings that we react upon words – regardless whether they are true. Usually we don’t filter. We hear. We feel. We react. Words can hurt like knives. And at the same time words can bring healing and uplifting. It all depends on the speaker.

How can you use this power in your workplace?

When you think of your ideal workplace – how would you like to work with your colleagues? What should be the atmosphere in your team? For example, I enjoy having a team that likes each other. I love to hear laughter and a loud “hey, good to see you! how are you doing?” when people from my team meet each other.

So, what do I do? I model exact that behaviour. I greet my team. I tell them how happy I am that they are there (and I am truly happy that each one of them is in my team!). I use words to express what I am feeling. Otherwise they wouldn’t know. And because they feel welcome, they are at ease and enjoy being around. And from what I am seeing – they are continuing to welcome new people in the team and extend the good atmosphere themselves.

How can you build your team with this power?

Your team consists of individuals. And you have to invest in each person individually in order to get a great team. What do I mean? When you are in a feedback session use the time well to speak potential into your people. Aside from the “well done here” and “please improve there” find time to speak about the future roles and responsibilities you see them in. Specify which strengths you see and where these attributes will contribute to the career of your team member.

When your team member hears you speaking strength and life into his/her life, he/she will start growing. It strengthens his/her self-esteem and self-believe. And that grown person will contribute to the team in the future – consequently the team grows.

How do you know what to speak?

If you are unsure whether you should make that statement let it run through this filter:

Is the statement true?
Is the statement helpful for the other person?
Can you speak it kindly? (meaning: with a kind intention)

If you asked yourself, you would immediately know that you would only want feedback spoken in that way: true, helpful, kind. Yet, very often we tend to be harsh, unfair or angry.

BUT: “I am not a person of words”

Quite often the discussion on speaking to each other hits the “I am not a person of words” argument. Meaning: I don’t want to speak to my team. (I assume you have the ability to speak, so the only reason you do not use this ability is a pure choice.)

You can choose in life whatever you want: speech or silence. But don’t expect people to know what you are thinking. Quite often frustration joins the discussion: “but they should know…” This is based on the assumption that the logic of your brain must be the logic of all brains – especially of your team members. To make that clear: You are responsible to speak your mind. If you choose to stay silent, it will have consequences, e.g. a team that is not doing what you want.

Words have the power to transform your team. So does silence. You choose what you want to model.