• Highheels

    Why I don’t want your advice

    “Forget all I have advised you in the past years“, my boss says in our last meeting on my last day of work “and just continue doing what you think is right. You will need it where you are going.” I am smiling. He is smiling. The past years, I have been some sort of a troublemaker in his department – in the best sense of the word. I brought in new ideas, conducted trainings in project management for the colleagues, started cooperations with HR and delivered some projects despite adversity. But I didn’t blend in with the colleagues who just wanted to do their job. He advised me from…

  • Highheels

    What I would tell my younger self

    When I listen to people who have done a successful career, it all sounds like a pathway of pre-aligned steps. Even the hard moments contribute to the bigger picture in the retrospective. It feels so natural that all decisions, ups, downs and detours lead to a well assembled storylining. It is hard to believe that the future of these people actually was a blank page waiting for them to write their first paragraph. Recently, I was writing down my own CV with all the projects that I delivered and all the different topics I pursued. While I was writing, I could actually see the same red line in the past…

  • Highheels

    The lies you believe

    “The grass is greener on the other side” expresses what we often believe – that someone else has a better share in life than we got. When I just recall the talks I had the past weeks…. the university in that other city which managed pandemic-restrictions and classroom-trainings better … that other company that made more deals in these times … that friend who gets better support from the family in caring for the children. We all have the tendencies to compare – and somehow we manage to always loose within the comparison. We actually find reasons and angles in which the grass on the other side really seems to…

  • Boots

    Grief is a sneaky bitch

    The warmth of the sunlight is touching my face, I can smell the first flowers of the year and the birds are singing a melody of hope. In these moments I believe, I can actually make it. That life has something positive for me that needs to be explored – despite the cold black emptiness within my heart. This icecold horror that nests within my core is a constant reminder that my life as I knew it, is over. Forever. ‘Forever’, echoes the creepy darkness while releasing a good portion of hopelessness. I loved my life. I didn’t want anything to change. All of this happened to me unplanned, unwanted,…

  • Highheels

    How to find a good coach

    Coaching supports change. You might want to bring your career to the next level or you are in need of a decision. Whenever you aspire change, coaching is a helpful tool to support you in the journey. The techniques used will always bring in different perspectives while you keep your freedom of choice without feeling judged. You can think of a coaching session as a think tank where you can throw your ideas on a white canvas and by looking at it from all angles, get new insight and inspiration. The role of the coach is to adjust the light, turn the picture and move your head around by asking thought-provoking questions. Once you have…

  • Boots,  Highheels

    What social work on sunday morning at 6am taught me

    It is early sunday morning. Cold. Dark. Rainy. The group of people meets to work together for a few hours for a social cause. ‘How is the energy level’, the leader of the group asks and smiles into the tired faces. You can call a 5 on a 10 scale a good average. One person puts it quite nicely: “Now I am a 5, put I am here because I know that at the end of our session, I will be a 10.” Four hours and a lot of work later, the group gathers for the wrap up. Everyone smiles and is happy. The work ran smoothly, there was time…

  • Highheels

    Why being ‘predictable’ will make you a great leader

    When you watch a magician or a comedian and the punchline is too obvious, it gets boring. In these situations, you want to be surprised, amazed and fascinated. The next step on stage shouldn’t be predictable. This is what brings in an element of excitement and gives you a good night of entertainment. As predictability is often associated with boredom, some people hesitate on how to act once they are in their first management position. As they don’t want to become a lame duck in leadership, they might try to react differently to similar requests or at least keep their potential reaction a secret. Unfortunately, this will lead to insecurity…

  • Boots

    How to handle pressure

    My heart is racing. I can feel the steady hammering against my chest. Strong. Loud. My thoughts are spinning. Fast. Unstoppable. ‘What if I cannot meet the deadline?’ ‘What if the result is too weak?’ ‘What if I am not convincing enough in this important meeting?’ WHAT IF … I fail … I loose… I am not enough!? The what-ifs kill my sleep. The pressure takes away my joy. The stress assassinates my peace. I am not me anymore … and I have no idea what to think … or do … I hate these moments. This is not the life I want. This needs to STOP! So I pause.…